Hi Jeff, I was hoping to see you again. Remember me? You took at least 3 rides in my car, all of them long ones.

(speeding down a steep hill)

…Remember? Then you must remember how you promised to generously tip me on the app, right? Every time. And you never did. Oh, you’ll make my day with your tip this time? I have a better idea. As a matter of fact, that’s the only reason I picked you up today.

(pulling over at the rural bus stop, which is nothing but a sign on a pole)

Here we go Jeff, learn to ride a bus. I’m going to block you, and I’m the only driver in this area online today. The next bus arrives in 20 minutes. An Uber from adjacent city arrives in 25-30 minutes. And according to Accuweather, it’ll be raining cats and dogs in 22 minutes.

Don’t forget to tip the bus driver, Jeff. Bye sweetie!